Stage forms this act uses in the library, and how often.
One character says they already know, then suddenly cries out that their stomach hurts.
Was there one, I wonder...?
Textbookありましたか？Polite 「ありましたか」 becomes plain past 「あった」 + 「っけ」 (trying to recall); 「なぁ」 makes it musing to oneself.
In a sketch about a chance reunion with a father, one person sincerely apologizes to the other.
So I'm the only one who's had it rough!
Textbook私ばかりが大変ではありませんか。'ばかり' gets an emphatic small 'っ' ('ばっかり'), then drops 'り' → 'ばっか'. Also casual '俺' and 'じゃん' instead of '私' and 'ではありませんか'.
One performer brags that a place comes with a pool, and the other keeps joking that it's only a taxi pool.
Culture note In Japan, a 'taxi pool' is the waiting area where taxis line up, for example at a station.
You can't do that, not without asking!
Textbookそれは勝手にやってはいけませんよ。「やってはいけません」 becomes 「やっちゃダメ」: ては contracts to ちゃ, いけません is swapped for casual ダメ, and 勝手に is tacked on as an afterthought.
One performer keeps slipping into innuendo, saying Takuro shakes violently at night, and the other keeps trying to stop them.
You can't say that now!
Textbook今それを言ってはいけませんよ。'言ってはダメ' fuses 'ては' into 'ちゃ': '言っちゃダメ'. Casual 'ダメ' (with plain 'だ') stands in for 'いけません', and the final 'よ' keeps the same firm warning tone as 'いけませんよ'.
A band member wants to tell a man named Shimoike about a new song, but keeps mixing up Shimoike's name.
No, that's not right.
Textbookいいえ、違います。Plain 「違う」 drops the polite 「ます」 of 「違います」, and casual 「いや」 replaces 「いいえ」 as 'no.'
One person keeps insisting their own reunion comes first, even after the other tells them to stop joking.
Culture note In Japanese, 再会 (reunion) and 再開 (resume) are both pronounced 'saikai', so the joke is a pun.
Reunion this, resume that—shut up already!
Textbook「さいかい、さいかい」と、うるさいですね。'うるさい' becomes 'うるせー': the 'ai' sound collapses into a long 'ee', a rough, masculine form; 'な' adds exasperation.
At an apartment viewing, someone looks the place over closely, commenting as they go.
Whoa.
Textbookすごいですね。In rough casual speech the 'oi' ending of 「すごい」 fuses into a long 'ee': 「すげえ」; polite 「ですね」 is dropped.
After mixing up Shimoike's name, a band member finally gets Shimoike's attention to pass on news about a new song.
Tsuchiya came in with a really great song.
Textbook土屋さんが、すごくいい曲を書いてきたんですよ。「すげえ」 is 「すごい」 with 「ごい」 slurred to 「げえ」. Here it means 'really' before 「いい」, standing in for the adverb 「すごく」.
One voice keeps announcing that the other is opening up and a door will open; the other insists they'll shut it instead.
Well then, it's closing.
Textbookでは、閉まります。Casual speech shortens 'では' to 'じゃ', stretched to 'じゃあ': a quick 'well then' that picks up the partner's 'むしろ閉ざすよ'.
At the end of the sketch, one says their teamwork proves they are father and son, but the other refuses to accept it.
Culture note Japanese comedy duos often end a sketch with 'もういいよ' (enough already) before bowing out.
Enough already.
Textbookもう結構です。Textbook '結構です' is swapped for the everyday word 'いい', the polite 'です' is dropped, and sentence-final 'よ' is added: 'もう結構です' → 'もういいよ' = 'enough already'. It is the classic line that ends a comedy routine.
One performer thinks "Hanshin" means the train line, but the other insists that "Hanshin" normally means the Tigers baseball team.
Culture note Hanshin is both a railway company in the Osaka–Kobe area and the owner of the famous Hanshin Tigers baseball team.
What's that? What do you mean, "normally"?
Textbookそれは何ですか。「普通は」とはどういう意味ですか。「それは何ですか」 flips to 「なにそれ」: は and です drop, word order reverses. 「何よそれ」 repeats it with a pushy 「よ」.
Two men argue over whether one just said 'Siren Night', then switch to complaining about someone who ran off.
I mean, they ran off? That's seriously unbelievable.
Textbookというか、逃げたなんて本当にありえませんね。「というか」 becomes 「っていうか」 (「と」→「って」), then 「つーか」 (「って」→「つ」, 「いう」→「ー」), shifting topic: 'I mean.' Also 「ありえない」→「ありえねえ」 (「ない」→「ねえ」) with casual 「な」 at the end.
Someone gives a stiff, formal speech that seems to be for a wedding, then tries slipping in a little joke.
Ugh, he is so freaking boring.
Textbookいや、もう、あの人は非常につまらないですね。「つまらない」 shortens to 「つまんない」 (ら→ん), then gets rougher: 「ない」→「ねえ」 gives 「つまんねえ」. Slang 「激」 means 'super'.
A detective and a suspect argue about the suspect's alibi, and one of them claims it can be broken easily.
Well yeah, obviously.
Textbookいや、それはそうですよ。"それは" is squeezed into "そりゃ" (れは → りゃ). "そりゃそうだ" is a set phrase meaning "well, of course."