セバスチャン

Two performers tease each other about their crotches, and one says the other's is so small that their wife calls it 'Snack Stick'.

Culture note Karupasu is a small, thin dried-sausage snack sold cheaply in Japan.

1. 0:00どこやっこりしてんの!≈ unclear audioprobably 何もっこりしてんの!What's with the bulge?!
2. 0:02誰かここで股間でかいでしょとアピールするんだよ≈ unclear audioprobably 誰がここで股間でかいでしょとアピールするんだよWho comes out here just to show off how big his package is?
3. 0:04股間こかんでいじられたらお前まえだよお前まえIf anyone gets teased about their package, it's you. You!
4. 0:06股間こかんちっちゃすぎてお前まえ奥おくさんにカルパスって呼よばれてんだからYours is so tiny your wife calls you 'Snack Stick'!
5. 0:12いや、言われんのやろ≈ unclear audioprobably 言われんの嫌やろSee, you hate it when it's said about you, huh?
6. 0:13お前まえ言いわれんのはダメなんだわYou just can't take it when it's said to you.
7. 0:16いじられんのはダメなんだお前まえYou can't handle getting teased, can you?
8. 0:18一人めちゃくちゃいじるくせに≈ unclear audioprobably 人めちゃくちゃいじるくせにEven though you rip into everyone else like crazy.

After a formal interview-style exchange ends, one performer harshly judges the other's "cost" and "performance" like a business.

1. 0:01では結果けっかは後日ごじつ郵送ゆうそういたしますWe'll mail you the results at a later date.
2. 0:03よろしくお願ねがいしますThank you very much.
3. 0:03パフォーマンスがゼロだなお前まえYour performance is zero, man.
4. 0:07コストだけかかってパフォーマンスがなかったよAll cost and no performance.
5. 0:10大おお赤字あかじだもんWe're deep in the red.
6. 0:12これじゃやってけないよWe can't keep going like this.
7. 0:14設定せっていとかめんどくさいから'Cause setting it all up is a pain.